Summer holidays

My fourth year of school is already finished, unlike most degrees, i still have my fifth yearcoming, and alhamdulillah.... Itd my finsl year. Just got my results the other day, and suffice to say, im hsppy with my results, could have done better but.. Yeah syukur alhamdulillah... I have been back in Brunei for 3 weeks now... Or less, hmmmmm.. But yeah, its been a busy 3 weeks... 2 days after coming back home, I went to KL with waie and mama... To do a little bit of shopping...but mostly around the area of masjid india.. Lol, it was a shopping spree for me.. Imagine, 15RM for a pashmina scarf.. That is absurdly cheap!!! Lol, the thing is that there was just too many.. I felt like taking all the scarfs, but with limited budget, i cant.. Lol, the same goes with kain... I didnt take too much pics though.... Too budy browsing around.... And mom ought me a new wallet, coz i used up most of my money already.. Lol but yeah, was really fun, but at the same time, really tiring as well... I was so fed up with flights.... Lol But anyway, been brscing up for preparations for....... Its both exciting and stressful, coz the btb is not here... She's coming bsck this friday after 3 weeks in holland, at this time... She is in rome for holidays... Im so jealoud, but not too worry, i will be going there.. Definitely... One day.. Who knows if i do need to do my exams after two ye of working, think ill get another two weeks of leaves, and tour europe.. Lol Okay, my arms are tired with typing all this words... Tired from all the practice with netball yesterday......hahahaha today cuti padal im having this mild hives/urticaria... Haihhhhh

its about....

Nothing much lol

This has been inside my head for such a long time

Just wanting to write this down

The more you dont know me
The more private I seemed to be

:)

Awesome vid!

10th month of the year

Time flew so fast yea?

9 months have passed now, its just.. unbelievable.....

That also means that it wont be long till I come back to Brunei... again.

Hehehe going to spend my second last 'real' summer holidays. Next year, going to brace for my final (5th year) of my course, then insya Allah, I will be back in Brunei and contribute my skills to the people of my beloved country. No jokes.. I am actually quite excited when thinking about the prospects of graduating end of next year, yet I felt... scared. I felt like ilmu atu alum lagi cukup di dada, if you know what I meant. Hehehehe

Balik brunei for cuti this year also meant that I am going to busy helping my family out for the first ever big event. Lol, I would not want to mention it now, nanti kena wrath from a particular someone, but yeah...

Also, I wanna go travel nanti. Dont know where to be honest. Told my parents that I wanna go to China for this 'Bruneian's trail to China' group tour, and its a muslim tour, meaning we'll be visiting a number of mosques (and other landmarks as well) and halal food will be provided, and if I am going alone, i need to pay around..... 1.7k Brunei ringgit.. tops and that is for 8 days. Well, I think the price is quite reasonable. Okay, might be a bit pricey than if I wanna go around, alone with my own iterinary. Lol, I will be lost in China to be honest, with not knowing how to speak the language, and read the signs, and with lots of people (which can be overwhelming), I prefer to stick with a tour group. Oh yeah.... know what, tryin' to persuade my parents if I can go alone, but nope... I was slapped with a big NO. hahahahaha, yeah... I was expecting that answer anyway but it is so difficult to find someone to go with, to be honest. Well, dad told me my little brother is going with me, if im going, and according to dad, its my bro's will to go with me. Hahaha yeah right... nope, thats not what I heard from lil bro. He's only going to satisfy my need to go travelling, and to be honest.. i dont wanna babysit for anyone.

Anyway, as usual.. i procrastinate. Its really tempting to deactivate my facebook account, but yeah... i felt it is unnecessary, just in case someone posted something about the exams and tips, so... lol.. i think i better leave my facebook as it is.

PS: I just realised I've been posting some seriously geeky stuffs. Lol, sorry if its boring to read! Hahaha 

The start of oral surgery week

Assalamualaikum w.r.b.

I am currently in my oral surgery week rotation, in other words.. extracting teeth! To be honest, it was quite terrifying, because I am being thrown into an area where I have no expertise at all. Other than theory, that was not applied until this week. I had a hand on extracting teeth today, and oh my... it looks easy, but it actually quite hard. Well at least for me. Some people said.. oh.. its really fun, but to be honest, that fun part.. it still has not kicked in.

Well, its part of learning. Isnt it?

On the other hand, I wil be able to practice all my injections. Alhamdulillah. Still need to practice more though... insya Allah okay..

Anyway, thats all for today..

The cute girl... not! hahahaha

I know

I'm being so random

LOL, this pic was taken using Amni's fabulous SONY DSLR camera (cant remember which model.. sorry), lol.. the attempt of taking 'sel-ca' pics.. FAIL.. its just too near.. and yeahh.. hohohoho

Anyway, commenting on the pic...

I have quite a normal-high gummy smile line... my dentition, needless to say, I havent brush my teeth then, yet..... but it looks.. normal. Hehehehe

Im bored! Yet, i have to study for the visual interpretation test. The progress of my study? SLOW! So much to learn, and im really worried! haiihh, mudahan jua berjalan lancar! Amin amin amin!!!

That's all for the night

And ohhh.. this is my 28th post for the year, which is one more than what I wrote last year. So yippeee.. hehehe

Assalamualaikum everyone, and good night ^_^

one week break!

Assalamualaikum,

Yayayayayayayay cuti sudah start. Alhamdulillah, but there is no time to relax because..... jeng jeng jeng........ have to study for this visual interpretation test after the break, i have my oral surgery rotation and.... an ortho book test! Wow... fun times huh...

That does not mean that I cannot have a bit of a break too. Hehehe, so my plans for this break is
1. Make some cakes for raya
2. Catch up with some friends and.... go ngupi
3. Watch some movies..
4. And ofcourse studehhhhhh

To be honest, i would like to go to Queenstown, tapiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ............................................................................. malas kan cakap, will just list out what I want from queenstown
1. NANDOS
2. PATAGONIA HOT CHOCOLATE..

Man, these two things are the best! The best....

Ramadhan is coming to an end, and as I said before, I didnt really achieve much. Its sad in a way..... i do think i managed to improve myself in some aspects... but that's it. Insya Allah will try to improvise more! insya Allah

Last words from me for today's blog

For these past few months, I just realised my life is revolved around a few really good friends... Tempat mengadu, tempat bercerita, tempat itu dan ini. I'm lucky, am I not? heheheh Alhamdulillah :))))

if only...

If only life is easy.. I would...

At times like this lah membuatkan diri semakin malass...

Im just so tired with all the clinical work

Partly my fault jua bah, cubatah bah ah... kana suruh sudah position duduk bisai2, masih jua kan dibuat yang menyakitkan diri in the end.. My shoulders feel so tight, my legs are sore from standing up for a long time (more than 1.5 hours), ditambah lagi the fact that I am not fit and I am fat! So.. hehehe hujung2nya ngalih, and seterusnya membuat diri supaya lagi procrastinate. Syabas mal... syabas!

Tommorow will be another day, another day filled with stress and worries. Hahaha dramaqueen much? I'll be doing my first endo case. I'm currently reading up on it, sounds simple but dont know when it comes to the practice, dont know if its going to be simple as it sounds. And i have to do it under 2 hours, LESS than 2 hours!! Haiihhh stress ehhhh, mudahan jua okay.. Rabbi yassir wala tu'asir ya kareem.. insya Allah...

Ramadhan is coming to an end soon, and I felt like I haven't achieved much. I felt so bad! Tapi mind ani macam procrastinate tia ganya. Its ridiculous.. im serious... Time cani ani tah sanangkan beribadah.. tapi inda jua banyak di buat. Mun sekadar few lembar of Al-Quran. Alum jua berapa. Mal mal, how can you become a good muslimah? Tapi insya Allah.. Ramadhan atau inda, will try to perbaiki diri ani further in the future.. insya Allah...

Bah anyway, xoxo end of this post, more to come. Heheheh

looking outside the window

Feeling a bit.... blegghh,, wanna go out... but I cant.. I shouldnt... need to finish this one assignment T_T

Kenangan

3 year+ has passed by, inda kerasahan...

Feels like it was yesterday.... I left Brunei to NZ to pursue my studies.

I came across this sketchbook. I had them even before I left Brunei, and friends wrote words in it.

This truly caught my eyes

' As time passes by, somehow that bond has begin to fade away'.. this was written nearly 3 years ago. Somehow that reflects how I feel now. Not by a little margin, but by lots.... we make new friends, but somehow I crave for my old ones.. hmm..

But anyway, enough for today.. and I should be off doing this -_-~~~

Salam xoxo

ps: lol, until now I still make a lot of grammar mistakes as I did in the first picture.

Love the way you ____~~??

I wont deny this, but I felt a bit left out looking at posts on facebook, JUST A BIT, but on a happy note, im glad. Hehehehehe what can I do kan? Different places of study, and different times of cuti. My cuti does not coincide with them. Looking at their happy faces, and smiles... who cares if im not there, as long as they're happy. Im glad the bond is still there, though im getting inches (or probably foots) further away from those bonds.

That is another thing about being further apart for the sake of studying, especially when it comes to me. But then these thoughtS, let me just keep it to myself. Hehehe this thought of mine is not worth to be put into this blog.

School updates

Im definitely getting more busy now, I have 2 assignments to finish, deadline is soon!!!!. And then, lots of tests and exam assignments to be done. Yet, the calling of facebook and twitter is really strong, that I always procrastinate with these two webs, i wish i can stop. I probably can. Maybe I should do it.. hmmm...

That also means exam is getting closer. 2 months to go and im freaking out because im not studying as much as I should have. Goshhh, why am I like this?

Alrighto, need to prep for my clinic this afternoon.. Dentures clinic. Hahaha i think im in big trouble today, but we will see

update

Wow.. blogger now has a new face! awesome! I'm awed by it, looks more user-friendly though.. hehehe

Anyway, I spent a month in Brunei for holidays. It was a quiet nice break, and I was able to have spent some time with my family. Thought it was going to be a boring holiday, turns out it was not. I was able to enjoy every second I was in Brunei, despite my siblings going to school, my eldest sister working in Seria, and Anis coming back during my last week in Brunei. All was well. Spent my birthday in Brunei too, but I hide my birthdate on facebook, see who manages to remember my birthday, and greeted me. Hahaha maybe my way of seeing who really care about me, call me childish but yeah, hahahaha, not so many greeted me, but I was happy, nonetheless! :))

So I am now back in NZ for my second semester. To be honest, I didnt want to come back. Hahaha been having too much fun in Brunei lah.

Turning 22 seems to add more responsibilities to my shoulders.

My dad has now begin to ask when am I going to get married. Lol, part of the reason is probably my eldest sister has a potential now, and I havent got anyone at the moment. The idea, however, seemed ludricrous to me. How am I going to get married if I dont have anyone special in my life. Hahaha oh yeah, I am 22, but love is a strange thing to me. I kept on saying this to my friends, but yeah, I dont know how it feels like. I had crushes before, but that does not mean that it's love. Now, currently, no crushes, no one I am having my aim at. Sometimes I feel like, if I continue on doing this, I would end up alone growing old. Something that I dont really want to happen to me. Lol, but finding someone that I would like to spend the rest of my life with, is just not easy. Not that im looking at looks, nor the luxury. Its just, finding someone who clicks with ME is not easy. I am not that easy going! People who're close to me should know that. Its like having this wall between me and the person who I just knew.

Anyway, Someone had volunteered to find me one, but if I dont have the commitment, how? Hahahaha, and me being fat is not helping either.  Maybe I can't focus on two things at once. Now I havent even finish my studies yet, how can I think about love? Sudah kan belajar ani pun tekapai2, kan becinta lagi.. aduiiiii.. susah!

Hmmm... maybe I should leave these thoughts till next time.

posting

Thought i just post up something here today....

Just wanna say

Only Allah s.w.t knows how I feel inside.

Enough said.

ZULKAEDAH

Perwatakannya pendiam. Banyak perkara baik pada dirinya berubah menjadi buruk. Dia banyak berfikir, kerana sifat ini, satu hari nanti dia akan mendapat hasil yang baik dalam kehidupannya. Tetapi oleh kerana banyak berfikir, perbuatannya kadang kala menjadi keliru. Dia seharusnya bertindak tanpa terlalu banyak berfikir untuk mendapat hasil yang yang memuaskan.


How true that is..


Well, from my POV.. I just have to be very careful. I sometimes had to turn to someone to ask for their opinion before I make a decision, but it does not mean that my decision is purely based on others' opinions. I just have to weigh the good and the bad before i make a decision

----

I just dont care, but in the matter of fact, I do

I FEEL SO EMOOOO NOW..

lol, i think its just my PMS playing up...

On the other hand, I've had a great time, doing things that I wanted to do, mostly alone.

Sometimes, some things just felt different.It definitely does feel different.

Maybe its time to play with my SLR, havent done that in such a long time!

dugaan

For the past few days, only Allah knows how stress I was, for reasons that I can't mention, or tell public.

Somehow, because of what happened, i see that a lot of people cared, only a few people know what really happened, and I had been so freaking emo about it, and lots of people asking why, and I feel grateful to have people that cares about me. I totally appreciate it.

What happened to me was my fault, but it serves as a warning so that I wont do that mistake ever again. I was too naive, too naive!!

But it's all settled now except this one last thing, which hopefully will be done in 3 weeks time.

Lastly, I am so grateful towards all the people who are involved with helping me out, I dont want to mention who, but you know who you are (if you are reading this blog) lol, walaupun mulut inda berkata, tapi hati ani bersyukur banar2.

This event also make me question, of why it happened. Allah knows best, and maybe he has something in store (a.k.a lessons, etc) for me, at this time, i dont know why it happened, but I am sure, behind this, there will be something good that will come out, Insya Allah :))))

Alright peeps.. ghost whisperer is waiting for me!! hohohoho

angry post

Salam

lol, i was just reading this one entry that i posted up onto this blog in january and hellllll, thats a hella scary one post. Lol...

I find it funny now and a bit immature that I wrote that post. Lol, im not going to delete it... just as a reference in the future :D, one of the major reason why I might wrote that post is PMS... it should be, if not, i would not write up an entry like that.

xoxo

considering things

To be honest, im probably not as 'busy' as you guys are. I almost dont have any assignments to do, other than presentations, which as usual, i do last minute, and also tests coming up and boom.. after that, exam. I've been procrastinating all this while. Hahaha now I regretted it. Alhamdulillah, this made me realised 1 month before the exam. haahahaha kalau inda, abislahhhhh

Clinics have been making me so busy these days. Imagine only 3 hours of clinic per day from monday to thursday is already making me feel tired, apatah lagi when im going to work nanti. Its just, I dont know, quite overwhelming. The thought of me working, from 8-5pm, its just.. lol, too much at this stage. Looking into people's mouth at most 8 hours a day, hahahaha thats something.

I'm always tempted to do this to be honest, im not so sure if ive done this before, but yeah, sometimes I do want to talk about how my clinic went, how's my patient and the relevance to their overall oral health, what procedures i have done, what makes me stressed so much. There's so many things about dentistry that I can talk about, but when I want to put it into a blog, i just dont know what to write. Lol, and im not so sure about patient's confidentiality issue. Lol, but I see a lot of dentists post up pictures and tell readers their experience about being a dentist. So maybe I can do so, without compromising the patient's identity.

Hmm...

Maybe, we will see.

Hehehe anyway, Salam and have a good day peeps

Home

Salam everyone

I miss home so badly......... batah lagi kan balik ani ehhhhhhh, i can't wait!! hehehehe

Anyway.. a friend of mine from facebook wrote this quote on facebook

'People change but if you change, you don't kick your old friends just because they are still who they are when you met them before. '

I've always had this issue in my mind on how people around me has changed. Well, not that I have this issue in my head recently, its been going on since I came back to Brunei for holidays after I finish my 1st year. Somehow I just could not really adapt to my friends. I wondered why... at first, of course I thought that its because they have changed. As time goes by, that kind of thinking faded away and I had the realisation, that maybe that they were the ones who stayed the same all this time, and the person who had changed all this while was me.

Pikir punya pikir, it may be true. I came to NZ to study, meet a new circle of friends, spending my 9 months with them and 3 months back home. 9 months ( X by 3 now) is quite a long time to change myself bit by bit in terms on how i think about things. I honestly don't know if my thinking around some issues has become more mature or has it gone backwards? That, im not so sure.

But coming back to the topic, really.. the quote that my friend has said, all this while, I had this in the back of my mind. Frankly, I wont deny that I have changed. It may cause some people a bit or a lot of discomfort, hahaha but yeah... sometimes i just can't help it. Kan cakap im getting more introverted and rather keep things to myself, its true in a way, but sometimes its not. Ahhh im contradicting myself now but anyway, yeah you get the drift. Hehehehe anyway, I dont want you guys to think that I'm writing this because of you readers, but rather, to remind myself about how I should not come onto the conclusion or specifically judgemental about people especially those friends/family that I have.

Believe it or not, for me, this is something that was not easy for me to do, but.. i've been working hard to try and not be as judgemental as I was before. hahaha..

This may be a confusing post for you guys, so hoped you had fun reading. Lol

Salam :)

PMS

Salam

Turns out that I was really PMS-ing when I was having my bad mood. Putting on top of that, some people had irritated me to another level, lol... so explaining my outburst on some people. I know deep in my heart that its wrong to unleash it to people who are not guilty of it, but I just can't help it. I seriously can't control my emotions. If im happy, or sad or angry or whatever it is, i wont be able to mask it and make it as if im the opposite. I just can't. If im sad/angry, and i posed a happy face, that's just not me then. I think that's one of my qualities, and it is also one of my bad traits to be honest. Well people, you guys just can suck it up. If you dont like it, fine, i can't help it. Anyway... im trying to spend my time being happy if i can, well most of the time I am.. but just some of the moments make my mood go yucky! heheheh

anyway, im out.. salam :)

emo

Lol,

I just realised how emo I was for the past few weeks. I feel better now though, inda ku tau kenapa. Maybe lots of things that made me upset accumulated, hence the outburst.

Anyway, i've been relaxing.. hahaha not that i didnt touch my books at all, just that... i didnt spend time on it as much as I should be. Tapi inda papa, still can catch up lah..

Okay.. thats it. Just wanna let you know that this PMS/stress mode is over.. for now

Cheers :)

if you only knew

A lot of things recently had me feel so frustrated. I dont really want to talk about it, coz I rant out enough last time. Just everytime... everytime, i started to feel good, something just come over to my mind and crush it. Crush it like that. Now, i feel like i can't enjoy my free time ever! i feel tired, i feel stressed. Yeah im complaining, so what? should I just keep it to myself and make myself feel even more depressed?

I dont know why, but sometimes.. its just becoming too unbearable.


Just recently, someone just made me feel so pissed, eventhough its a small thing. Its just a freaking small thing, and im pissed.... i dont even know what's going on with me now. I dont know.... just let me be, you guys.. i doubt you guys understand. I doubt it.

updates...

Salam everyone,

Just now, Buz reminded me of the existence of this blog. I did not, on purpose, neglect this blog. It is just that, my mind are full of things now regarding to dental stuff. Even I dreamt about teeth in my dreams. No kidding here. Its just been an intense month. Honestly, I have been really stressed out. I dont know whether I am doing the right thing now, its my fourth year now and I feel very conflicted about the course. It is interesting, of course, but me being stressed out and a lot of things to learn is just so overwhelming. Not to mention, I always feel anxious whenever I go to clinics. Its just insane how I feel anxious, especially on my thursdays clinic. I apparently had this one really good but strict tutor, who managed to make me feel stupid whenever I come to the clinic. Yes, maybe I made a bad impression on her since the first day, and gosh, it makes me feel so bad, until now. Yeap, its going on every week, and you know what, i always.... ALWAYS make mistakes. Always make mistakes on thursday clinics. Makes me wonder why I've taken dentistry in the first place, since I am not superbly good at studying. Somehow when I talked about this with someone, maybe because they're not me, they dont really understand how I felt. I keep on thinking on how to improve myself! Imagine, starting of every week, till thursday, I will so anxious that its hard for me to sleep. No, its not imsomnia. Its just I... i dont know. Somehow I hope I can just get out of this phase, when she would not just scold me in clinic. Seriously, if this continues, it will be bad... for me.

Anyway, there you go. An update. Sorry guys, I have nothing interesting, at the moment, to share with you guys. I'm just stressed. I haven't been going out a lot, to be honest. My weekends are filled with procrastination, and books books books books, and sometimes library. It makes me stressed that I don't have a regular thing to relieve my tension. Well, we play netball, and go to the gym almost every week, but I need something else to reduce my stress.

Anyway, enough of this, ill try blogging once my mood is stable.

Salam
:)

Updates

Its been more than a month since I last updated my blog, and to be honest, i was quite busy with things. School started 2 weeks ago, and before that, I was busy trying to prepare the things that I needed to bring to NZ, and its been such a hectic month for me.

Since school started, I thought they were going to be easy on us, well just to let us adapt to school first before doing all the busy things, but they just threw us into it. It's just been two weeks, and i barely can breath. Well, except for a few things, I didnt touch my books at all during the holidays. I did acquire two books (i photocopied them) but I just could not find the mood to read them, because its holidays. I know its going to be really hard this year, i thought maybe I could relax during the summer. Hence getting back into school is just a bit challenging, i guess coz i need to refresh all the knowledge that has been given to us for the past two years.

Anyway, i guess I have to do it fast.

I will not say that I dont have enough time this year to blog, that's a lie. Ill try my best, ill try to find ways to update my blog regularly, hopefully...

Anyway peeps.. its a sunday, but I need to study. Haiihhhhh..

smiling

Looking at others and looking at myself....

It seems that while smiling does come naturally to others, it doesnt come naturally to me, myself.... well, except to those someone who is well acquainted to me, someone who is really close to me, it is easy to give them a natural and happy smile.

For the past few days, honestly... I have seen past classmates... be it from primary school, or secondary school or even from form sixth school. Imagine how time can make me change, imagine how time can make two person, who were comfortable enough to speak with each other, not to speak or even acknowledge the other person after a period of time. Funny that this actually happens to me. Well, I dont want to speak of names, but to be honest, those people are in my friend's list on facebook. So now should I delete them? I was wondering, should I be the one who say Hi... or should I wait for the other person to say hi or hello to me?

I just truly find this funny.

Okay, looking at facebook for example.

You know how sometimes people travel to their friends' place, even after quite a while, they havent even meet each other and they were still able to converse comfortably. Well, i think they do keep in contact all this while, which in contrast, for example me... i dont really keep in contact. Maybe that's why the drift has kept on becoming bigger...  so fault is on me I guess..

Sometimes I do feel bad, you know.. for not being able to keep in contact, and also i do feel bad because some people wont just acknowledge me, but then to think about it. My life and their lives... we probably dont walk on the same path anymore. Though I truly happy for them being happy even without me in their lives...

Anyway, enough said.

The reason why I even wrote this blog is that I actually spent time with a few friends today, and same with yesterday and the day before, they never ceased in making me laugh heartily. I just feel happy whenever I spent time with them, to be able to speak of things in your life freely than usual, its fun. I am just grateful, while it seems that I was the one who left this circle group of friends of mine (because of a rift), this other circle group of friend were there for me to spend time with. Not that I am trying to replace this circle with that circle, i dont replace friends. Anyway, what I am trying to say is that I am just grateful that someone is there for me when I need them, when I need to talk to someone face to face. I am just grateful.

Anyway.. thats all

PS: Some people do know this, but if I dont mention anything to anyone, even if you ask me questions that I dont want to answer, dont expect that you could get me to say it.... hehehe

couple pictures

Looking at facebook pictures...

Pictures of friends with spouses..

Pictures of friends with fiancee

Pictures of friends with their boy or girlfriends

Pictures pictures pictures..

couple pictures...


They all look so sweet that it made me jealous..

lol, not that I imagine myself in a picture with a significant someone, coz honestly, alum ku terpikir

but looking at their happiness, their smiles for each other.... its something that I feel envy about..

Wish I have that kind of happiness... Insya Allah, god wills..

F/F

Why do I have to make the term 'forgive and forget' so difficult to carry out....

Remembering past events (which happened long long time ago) is so painful, yet I wondered why havent I been able to even think about that person (or the group) in a positive way.

Is my ego too big? Am I that sensitive?

It is definitely something that I need to work on

Creating pages

Honestly, I have been thinking a lot

Im the type of person, who is definitely not compliant with writing blogs... so I am trying to change that around... and make this blog a little bit less....... gloomy.. hehe

Sometimes I wondered, should I even write posts regarding my interests which people might not even interested with. So I came up with this

I created 4 pages regarding my interests (well the top most interests - should painting goes in here as well? hahah... ) which probably need to be editted and words need to be posted up to the page...

Anyhoo.. hope you guys will enjoy it and tata

Salam

to go or not to go

Depends on my studying mode... either my mood berkobar2 mau baca the books or not. Kalau inda... hohoho sesiapun lah, nanti tah tu ertinya ku membaca

My music list

ambung

Know what?

call me ambung if you want to.... if that is your perception of me, whatever... i dont care
call me pemarah if you want to.... if that is your perception, i wont deny it because its true..... but remember, if i get angry, there's always a BIG reason for it to have happened..

and you know what

i dont care if you wanna call me anything.. bitch kah, whatever....... i do not care of what you think

As long as I think I do not do something to hurt people (or their sensitive feelings)........ and you still call me names (even behind my back)... i will just ignore you.

Nya orang, if inda puas hati sama orang, confront. Yeah, jadinya kalau inda puas hati with me, TALK to me face to face. Aku mendangar. Well, depends plang mun ku rela kah inda... hohohoho

end point....... though tani kana ajar forgiveness ani penting, if you want my trust/forgiveness, you have to earn it. I wont just give it blindly to people.

You know what triggers me to write this post?

Someone enquired about something to me, well to be exact... why am I not out with them? you know what? I am busy! Im freaking busy at times that I dont even have enough time.................... would you believe that? up to you..

you know what..

you can think of a lot of reasons..

si amal malas kan jalan kah
si amal inda rela bejalan sama 'aku' kah
si amal itu ini itu ini

you know what hurts....

listening from others that I havent go out with them..

you know what?

extend that invitation to me..... then baru cakap sama orang.. if i said no, then talk about me behind my back.... ani alum jua apa apa, banyak complen.. si amal atu lah ini lah atulah ini lah...

sorry, tapi im not the kind who will ask that person first to go out for lunch, because im not flexible with time (well of course, with the exception of islam and buzz, and my cousins..or if im really bored) whatever...

think of whatever things you want to think about me....

yes..

i've changed into a more ambung person in your eyes... and im sorry, because there's nothing much I can do to change that perception of yours...

apa tu quote orang Malaysia

Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh Luuuuuuuuuuuu

tut tut tut

Wawawawawawawwa 

adik adikku pergi sekolah hari ini~~~~~ 

sangatlah....sunyi.... 

cubatah cuti sekolah ani kana extend lagi 

inda ku terasa boring sendiri

sipun ada kaka tua yang masih tidur di sebalah atu.. 

kan membawa diri bejalan, haha alum tantu... 

cubatah abiskita beritahu 

cemanatah kan mengurangkan keboringanku 

paham? 

hohohohoohohohohohoho

kawan

I was talking to my dad about travelling.

About me travelling alone going to places, of which...... in the end, as always I was not allowed to go alone (except if ada orang menunggu at the other end) to which this topic was brought up.

Kenapa ko inda bawa kawanmu bejalan

I said... cemana jua... ada yang inda kana suruh parents, ada family issue, ada yang ada money issue, ada yang inda ingatkan diri (bila pasal makan baru ingat, no offence :))), ada yang malas... itu ini itu ini... susah jua bah eh

Too many things is in my mind now..... pasal kawan berkawan ani pun boleh jadi paning banarnya. Tapikan kalau kan dipikirkan, to have friends arent supposed to be that complicated, right?


So the main thing is that....


bila tani berkenalan sama orang..... BANYAK 

yang tani jadikan kawan..... is probably LESS THAN HALF of those we know

but in the end.....

the only ones who stick by you in the end...

is not even a percent of the 'friends' that you know.......


Funnily enough, the world works like that...

In the end, Allah saja yang tahu why such things happened/happens to me. Maybe ada hikmah di sebalikNya...